Don't Spell Angry

If the name doesn't make sense, it soon will. I'm pretty sure just about everyone loses their temper sometimes. We all get mad, get hurt, and when that happens, some of us just want to get even. The unfortunate side effect of these feelings is that usually someone gets hurt when people seek vengeance, and the vengeful person usually ends up regretting their actions.

For those of us who are part of the magical community, this gets even more dangerous (and it becomes even more important to calm yourself down). Really, what's the worst that could happen? So many things, especially if you think the best course of action is revenge and you are proficient with spells. Take into consideration that, when someone is angry or hurt, they "Harm None" thing tends to fly out the window.

From personal experience, I know that there are two options when a person is extremely angry, hurt, or upset when attempting spell-work. The first option is that you will be unable to focus properly; in this circumstance, the intent of the spell can be skewed. Even if you attempting to heal the emotional pain you are suffering, the energy can go wild, instead harming yourself or someone close to you. The second option is that you will be able to focus intently. So what? So you may believe you are thinking clearly and that you really do want to (insert malevolent action here) to whomever hurt you or belittled you or wronged you, but when you are calm again, you will realize that what you did was wrong. And when you realize that it is better to forgive people who are jerks sometimes, it will be too late, because by then the damage will have been done (and at this point, YOU will be the bigger jerk).

No matter how right it may feel at the time, you should never attempt a ritual or spell while you are mad. Take the time to cool off and calm down. And even when you are calm, make sure that your spell-work is focused on letting go and healing instead of harming those who have harmed you.

Day Twelve

“By extending our love to the nurturing of someone else other than ourselves without any condition of strings, our capacity to love as a human being expands further and elevates us to a higher level of infinite consciousness.”

It has been an utterly exhausting day. It is currently 11:30pm; I’ve been awake since 8:15am, and have been running errands, cooking, cleaning, attempting to socialize, being forced to endure the preaching at my parents’ church, and so many other things that I haven’t had a chance to breath today. I’m all ready for bed, but I wanted to make sure I finished today’s reflection before I pass out.

At this point in my life, strings are just part of the package. If I am going to love and nurture someone, I at least expect a little gratitude. At least. I prefer to be repaid in loving kindness. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. Sometimes people take advantage of those who love unconditionally and without expectation (I know, as I’m usually the one doing the loving), and those people are just out to use those who will love them and care for them.

Even though I’m a bit jaded at this point, it is still possible for me to be a little less selfish. Take tonight, for example. I had absolutely no desire to go to church with my family and be preached at and forced to sing songs about a savior I do not believe in. However, there is more to life than just me, and it meant a lot to my parents that I went with them (and the rest of the family). I didn’t expect anything as payment, I went to make my parents smile.

Sometimes that’s all we really need in life, just a reason to smile. So today, I hope everyone can find a reason to smile; but even if you can’t, it would be nice if you could be someone’s reason to smile.

Day Seven

“One’s compassion for others is feeble until one has mastered compassion through the discipline of harmonizing one’s body, speech and mind.”

It has become apparent to me that my project is having an effect on other people, as well as myself. How do I know? If the events of today had happened two weeks ago, they would have been handled in a very different manner. I had someone from my past contact me today because he wants to talk. Two weeks ago I would have told him to piss off and leave me alone, but as I am trying to be more compassionate when it comes to the suffering of others, I will be contacting him tomorrow.

So, onto today’s lesson; well, I’m working on it. I have had a sharp tongue for well over a decade, and I am a little jaded from several events which have transpired over the course of my adult life. With that in mind, I’m sure my loyal readers can understand that it is difficult to keep the first words out of my mouth from being snarky and sarcastic, but I am working on it.

To answer a concern addressed a couple days ago; I am not trying to make myself perfect. I have no desire to be the type of person who make everyone else look bad by being so absolutely wonderful all the time. What I am trying to do is become the person I have always wanted to be. I want to be someone who takes time out of my day to help others (whether by helping to change a flat tire or buying someone food who doesn’t have any, or helping a friend with a project that can change her life for the better). I want to be that person, and it is going to take a lot of work for me to get there, but I am willing to put in the necessary hours.

I would write more about my journey tonight, but I have a friend who is about to hit a rough patch and I will be sending him all of the loving energy I can spare to help him get through as smoothly as possible. Goodnight, all.

Day Five

“True compassion comes about as the result of the awakening of our true nature that is accompanied by the lucidity of pure consciousness and the direct experiences of emptiness as the nature of reality.”

                To be honest, I haven’t really had time today to do anything other than shop and wrap presents. It is only now, as I am getting ready to go to bed, that I have even had time to look at today’s lesson. But since I have committed myself to this project, I refuse to let one day pass that I do not take at least a little time to contemplate the daily lesson, and write about my thoughts and experiences.

                I have never been a big fan of reality. Reality is cold and harsh and filled with unhappiness and sorrow. The good thing about reality is that it only takes a slight shift to bring a little light into someone’s world. When it comes to showing compassion, I have always favored the innocent as more deserving; not that I believe adults should be allowed to suffer, just that I believed children to be more in need of the compassion. With that train of thought in mind, my friend and I picked a child from a local angel tree to buy gifts for this year. It wasn’t much, some clothes and a few toys, but it makes us smile knowing that that one little girl will have a happier Christmas morning because we were able to donate a little thought, a little time, and a little money.

                As a generalization, most people feel more willing to give and show compassion during the holidays. Almost everyone I know is willing to donate food, blankets, warm clothes, toys, and many other things. But what of the rest of the year? There are people who suffer and are sad every day of the year. Most of us, though, would rather not think about such things all year long. The people who are truly compassionate, however, coordinate food donations and help out is so many other ways all year long.

                If I am to become a truly compassionate person, I need to open my eyes to the world around me; to see the bad along with the good, and I need to care enough to do something about it. If one in twenty people were to wake up tomorrow and decide that they want to make a positive difference in the world, we could start a powerful movement of caring, compassion, and peace. Maybe it won’t happen today, but I for one would be happy to see it happen sometime during my lifetime.

Day Four

“Love is the motive, the will, and the power source that propels every single human desire into fruition. So be mindful to maintain pure intent in all things we undertake.”

                When I told a friend today about this project, he told me he was worried about me and made me promise not to overextend myself. With the holidays so close, work has slowed down, I just finished finals for my classes, and all of the groups I belong to are taking a break until at least a week after the New Year; I didn’t understand where he thought I would be overextending anything. He explained that self-improvement is a big project, bigger than most realize. I love my friends, but this one in particular, he is my best friend.

                Family and friends are very important to me. I was lucky enough to be raised by wonderful parents, and be part of a loving and supportive family. Because of that, I sometimes forget that not everyone has been so fortunate. Not everyone is from a loving family, and not everyone can count on their friends for help when things get rough. It is not only me who is able to rely on my family and friends; they can rely on me as well. I can’t always help as much as I would like to, but I help in any way I can.

                What motivates me to help these people (and them me)? Love. Love is the driving force behind my actions when it comes to my family and friends. It is one of the most powerful forces in the world, and yet it is also one of the most fragile (as well as the one most taken for granted). Most people I know love their family and friends; not all, but most. We are all pre-programed to love those who are closest to us. But what of those we do not know? Those people we see every day, but do not know. So many of us just ignore these people and go on with our day. I see many people every day who are suffering. I can see it in their eyes, their posture, and their movements.

                While I was out today running errands, I did an experiment. As I walked through the grocery store or the Post Office, I smiled; such a simple thing to do. I smiled at the clerks who helped me and every person I passed. Almost everyone smiled back. Why did I do this? Because this morning I realized that I wanted to do something nice for everyone I saw today. For once there was no ulterior motive, I just wanted to brighten someone’s day, I while not all of the smiles were genuine, I could tell that at least a few people were glad to see a smiling face.

                In today’s lesson and reflection, I learned that love, kindness, and happiness are infectious, and that doing kindness for others is also doing kindness for me. I didn’t get anything monetarily from my smile experiment, but every smile that was returned warmed my heart, as I’m sure my smile warmed the hearts of others.

Day Two

“Action that arises from the motivation of awakening mind can always be counted upon to deliver the right kind of fruition.”

                I felt part of yesterday’s resolve slipping during today’s morning traffic. Luckily, as the day continued I could feel the peace creeping back into the center of my being. After a rather full work day, I came home to an evening of chores and helping with homework. However, I was able to take a short amount of time to myself for today’s lesson. 

                I recently experienced an awakening; not of my mind, but of my heart. It is a strange thing, feeling something so powerful one day, only to wake up the next and realize it was all a lie. No matter how much I may have wanted to close my eyes and keep believing the lie (and I did try), I knew that I would never believe it again.

                An awakening of the mind is very similar. It is when you realize that there is more to life than you. If you have not yet been awakened in this way, then you are (in my opinion) missing out. As with my compassion, I am on the path to awakening. My eyes are slowly opening to the truth that is all around me. As much as I want it to sometimes, the world does not revolve around me; there are many others that I must share it with, and though some may have it better, there are those who have it worse.

                With this in mind, I come to the conclusion of today’s lesson. The acts of someone who is awakening (or has already done so) are for the good of others, and not for selfish reasons. Because of this, the outcome will be beneficial to many instead of just to one.

Day One

“Compassion is not an expression of ordinary love tainted by the attachment to emotion. It is the energy of loving kindness that comes about as one’s mind awakens to the recognition that life we deemed as normal is impermanent and the lack of our recognition of its true nature is the cause of suffering.” 

                We all see people suffering every day. Many of us are willing to help a family member or a friend, but how many of us would go out of our way to help a stranger? How many see someone who is homeless or hungry and stop to help that person? The answer is both simple and unfortunate: not enough. 

                Compassion. We hear the word so often in life, yet many of us are unsure of what it really is. Compassion is showing love and kindness to others. No emotional connection is needed to show compassion, but there must be love in your heart. It is not limited to human beings; we can be compassionate towards animals as well and, in my opinion, the Earth.

                Around the world, compassion is seen as one of the greatest virtues; it is a virtue that I have been lacking for a long time. After reflecting on this the first lesson, I know that I need to take steps to refresh and renew the compassion which has been dormant inside of me for years. The first step I will need to take is to reawaken my empathy. I am working with a Reiki healer to realign and balance my chakras, which is necessary to my ability to feel empathy, since there is currently a rather solid wall around my heart. 

                I feel that today’s meditation has helped me to see the folly of my ways. I have for so long been focused only on myself and, occasionally, focus on my family and friends. That changes today. I can already feel the shift in my personal energy and my way of thinking. There is more to life than the shallow existence I have been leading, and now that my eyes are open to this, I do not intend to let them close again.

108 Days of Reflection and Meditation

Yesterday I was guided to a website (www.pathgate.org). One of the many pages is titled “Gems of Wisdom for Daily Meditation”. There are a total of 108 selections of Lama Dondrup Dorje’s teachings that are used by his students for daily reflection.

Today, I will start with the first “gem” for reflection and meditation. Each day, I will write down my thoughts, feelings, and reactions to that day’s teaching. My goal at the end of the 108 days is to know myself, and make positive changes in myself, my family, and the world around me. Through this exercise, I also hope to be better equipped to help those around me, whether physically, emotionally, or spiritually.

Energy Works

Not everyone believes that they have the power to influence others. I know I didn't used to. When I was 18, I thought it was completely ridiculous to think that my moods or thoughts had any effect on those around me. I have since learned better. I was 19 the first time I realized that I could manipulate energy. As with many other life lessons, I had no idea the possibilities that were about to be presented.

It was an innocent mistake. My friends and I were standing around, joking as usual and playing with our lighters. We'd flip open our Zippos, watch the flame for a few second, then flip them closed and enjoy their warmth. I had started a game of sorts, to challenge my friends to which of us could tolerate the most heat, leaving the lighter burn a little longer each time. Unfortunately, a still-opened lighter slipped from one friend's grasp and fell on another's hand, burning him pretty bad. I, being curious and always ready to help, took his hand gently...at least, I tried to. As soon as my fingers touched him, he pulled his hand back as if I'd shocked him. After a mini-interrogation, in which I revealed that I was feeling concern and a desire to help my friend heal as I reached out to take his hand, I was told that he could feel a jolt of energy from me that had instantly cooled his burned hand.

Several days passed and, as expected, the wound began to heal, but at a greatly accelerated rate. By the time one week had passed, it was completely healed, leaving only a scar in the waffle-pattern of the flame guard of a Zippo lighter.


After that, I had several lessons on the responsible use of energy and have since experimented a few times, just to make sure I can still do it. In the 12 years since that first incident, I have lessened pain from injuries and helped people heal, as well as changing the mood of a room from negative to positive, making small changed in the weather, on one occasion making a very significant change in the weather, and many other things.

I learned that it is possible to make changes to those around me if I can focus on doing so. But there is also a cautionary tale to go along with this little anecdote: as with everything else in magick, the intent plays a part on the outcome of what you do. In my example above, I only wanted to help my friend, and it had miraculous results. However, I have done things in the past with purely selfish intent, not caring who was hurt in the process. And let me tell you something, Karma will come back to bite you in the butt when people get hurt because of a spell you cast. It's not pleasant.

Learn from my mistakes, be careful what you do when it comes to energy manipulation. It is more rewarding by far to use your skills to help others than to do harm on those who have hurt you. Just a little something to think about.

Blessed Be