Don't Spell Angry

If the name doesn't make sense, it soon will. I'm pretty sure just about everyone loses their temper sometimes. We all get mad, get hurt, and when that happens, some of us just want to get even. The unfortunate side effect of these feelings is that usually someone gets hurt when people seek vengeance, and the vengeful person usually ends up regretting their actions.

For those of us who are part of the magical community, this gets even more dangerous (and it becomes even more important to calm yourself down). Really, what's the worst that could happen? So many things, especially if you think the best course of action is revenge and you are proficient with spells. Take into consideration that, when someone is angry or hurt, they "Harm None" thing tends to fly out the window.

From personal experience, I know that there are two options when a person is extremely angry, hurt, or upset when attempting spell-work. The first option is that you will be unable to focus properly; in this circumstance, the intent of the spell can be skewed. Even if you attempting to heal the emotional pain you are suffering, the energy can go wild, instead harming yourself or someone close to you. The second option is that you will be able to focus intently. So what? So you may believe you are thinking clearly and that you really do want to (insert malevolent action here) to whomever hurt you or belittled you or wronged you, but when you are calm again, you will realize that what you did was wrong. And when you realize that it is better to forgive people who are jerks sometimes, it will be too late, because by then the damage will have been done (and at this point, YOU will be the bigger jerk).

No matter how right it may feel at the time, you should never attempt a ritual or spell while you are mad. Take the time to cool off and calm down. And even when you are calm, make sure that your spell-work is focused on letting go and healing instead of harming those who have harmed you.

My Own Way

Since I have never been part of a coven, and I've never had a teacher, my only real guide is myself and whatever books I can get my hands on. This has its good and bad points. Since I have no teacher, I can just figure out whatever feels right and works for me, I don't have to follow the rituals and precise ways of someone else. The downside to it is that I have no one to teach me; there is no one to help me through my rituals and spells and no one to correct me if I'm doing something wrong.

This solitary methodology has led me to an interesting world of spiritual exploration. While I am certain there is a God and Goddess that help with whatever I may need, I can also feel different energies around me that are associated with the elements.

With this knowledge in hand, I figured out that most of the spells and energy is working with the elements, so I have adjusted the rituals to accommodate this. At first, I would light a white candle for each direction (North, East, South, West), but now that I know each is associated with a different element, I respect the differences and use a different medium for each direction (North - Earth - soil, East - Air - incense, South - Fire - candle, West - Water - holy water). I call each of the elements in turn (it is different each time, depending on how I am feeling and what I wish to accomplish) and then perform my spell or ritual.

Since making this change, I have noticed an increased success rate; not of my spells working, but working the way I wanted them to work. It is a wonderful feeling when something turns out the way it is intended.

Solo

Would have posted this sooner, but by cold has been kicking my rear end these past few days.

Wednesday evening, I performed my very first solo ritual. One of the ingredients I need for the cleansing I will be doing tomorrow is Holy Water, which is in short supply, since there are no stores in the area. Anyway, I adapted the Holy Water ritual from Silver RavenWolf's book Solitary Witch. Since it was my first solitary ritual, as well as my first ritual in nearly 5 years, I decided to have the instructions written down next to me for each step (so I wouldn't forget anything).

The feeling was absolutely amazing. I could feel the power of the Goddess and God flowing through me as I preformed the blessing. It was enough to make me cry tears of joy, and when I was finished, I was full of a confidence and energy I haven't felt in years. Truly, if you have never performed a ritual, whether alone or with others, I highly recommend it.

Caught Again

It has been quite a while since I composed a blog. For several weeks, I was unsure of how to proceed, or even if I should; but I feel it is necessary to share my experiences (and mistakes) with others. So, here goes.

I have been feeling "off" lately, though I could not explain why. Several times, I would find myself thinking things that would never have come to my mind without being planted there. I took it as the fluctuating hormones of my cycle and pushed it aside. Tonight as I sat at my laptop, contemplating the vastness of existence, I began to feel "off" again. This time, instead of pushing the feeling away, I analyzed it. In doing so, I recognize its source, and I cannot say that I am very happy about it.

For those of you who read my blog Something's Missing, you will know that I have been longing for my past connections with the supernatural. I so desired to reconnect with that part of my life, that I posted it for the world to read - almost as a wish or prayer for the connection to be rekindled.

Ever heard the saying "Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it?" Well, I got it. The "off" that I have been feeling lately is an entity I encountered during my Naval training...and not a particularly friendly one, at that. I am unable to do much tonight, but tomorrow I will be banishing evil from my house and then protecting it.

I have a few spells in mind to use, but they will need to be adapted to suit my needs. Once I have done that, I will post them (just in case someone else has need of something similar). Specifically, I will be making Holy Water for the first time and using it in the protection. I'm still trying to figure out the banishing ritual/spell. It should not be too difficult to find, though.

This is only the start, however, since I do intend to leave my house, and will need to have some sort of protection to keep on my person as well.

I will let you know tomorrow or Saturday how everything goes.

Blessed Be

Book of Shadows

I started working on my Book of Shadows today. Years ago, I remember thinking a Book of Shadows (BOS) had to be a huge, leather-bound book. It had to be filled with parchment paper and I would write in it all of my spells and thoughts on magick, but it would have to be written with an old-fashioned quill pen in perfect, even handwriting. It's entirely possible that I watched too much "Sabrina: The Teenage Witch" and "Charmed" when I was younger. I have since learned that the medium doesn't matter so much as the intent. So, without further ado, here's how I set up my BOS.

Materials:
1 - 2" Black Binder
1 - Silver Sharpie
2 - Packs of Sheet Protectors
1 - Pack of Binder Paper
2 - Packs of Dividers

With the silver Sharpie, I wrote "Book of Shadows" on the front cover. Then I opened the packs of sheet protectors and put them inside the binder. I printed out the Wiccan Rede and slipped it into the first sheet protector. I have also printed out a few spells, meditations, and general guides (meanings of colors, different crystals and stones, and a few other tidbits) that will also go in. The binder paper is all the way at the back, so that if I have notes to write or if I want to write or modify a spell, I can use that and then put it in a sheet protector. For the dividers, I have written on the tabs a few different sections for easy reference (basic rituals, cleansing spells, general information, meditations, tarot readings, tools, runes...).

It really is much easier to put together than I had originally anticipated. And, of course, what I did may not work for everyone, just do what is comfortable for you and within budget. There really is no need to break the bank buying a special journal to use if you don't have the money for one. Especially at back-to-school time, when many stores are having sales on everything I used for my own BOS. What's really important in all of this is that, no matter how you do it, your BOS works for YOU.

Blessed Be,
NightDancer

Handfasting

My fiance - who is not particularly religious - recently caved to my pestering and agreed to a Handfasting instead of a more "traditional" wedding ceremony. Now that the nagging has stopped, I have a more difficult task ahead of me: planning a ceremony that does not seriously offend my church-going relatives; most especially my uber-religious grandmother and her siblings. Luckily for me, one of my cousins is a Priestess and has already agreed to perform the ceremony/ritual for us.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not ashamed of my religious choices or the choices of my family, I just don't want anyone to have a heart attack or start screaming about how I'm a sinner and am going to hell on my wedding day. I've done some research online and read through a few books and most of them detail complicated rituals that likely make most of my friends and family very uncomfortable.

I was discussing this little dilemma with my cousin yesterday, and she came up with a solution I hadn't really thought of: for her, my fiance, and I to sit down and write a ceremony that works for us as a couple, but will not offend any of our non-Pagan guests.

We're going to wait until the wedding is a little closer before we have our first meeting, but at least we are headed in the right direction...ours.

Blessed Be

Don't Roll Your Eyes...

Tonight I prayed for the first time in a very long time. At this point, you may be asking why a self-proclaimed Pagan would spend any time praying. To this, I have but one question... why wouldn't I pray? Many of the Pagans I have met considered prayer a Christian thing and just wrote it off as useless to anyone who wasn't part of that religion. Of course, those were also the people who told me I was "doing it wrong" when I said I didn't belong to a coven, hadn't participated in any group ceremonies or rituals, and prefer a solitary practice of my religion/spirituality.

Back on topic, I have never known a more direct way to getting in touch with the higher powers than through prayer. There is no need for me to break out the altar and the white robe so that I can perform a ritual every time I wish to communicate. I don't have to chant, beat out a rhythm on the drums, or rhyme everything I say. I close my eyes, focus my energy, and reach out to the world around me. I usually don't pray aloud, since the sound of my own voice tends to break my concentration. Instead, I look within myself for what it is I am seeking and ask for it in my mind and in my heart. There is no set amount of time for me to do this; once I am certain that I have been "heard" by the higher powers, I give thanks and break the connection.

With what I've just revealed, you may now be asking a different question: How do you know when you've been heard? On this, I can only speak through my own experience. I feel it. It is a seed of warmth and light planted in my heart. Once the warmth and light surrounds me and envelops me in a sense of peace, I know I have been heard. This is one of the most wonderful feelings I have ever experienced. All of my fears and doubts are washed away, if only for a few moments.

Now I present you with a of couple questions of my own: How do you pray? How do you know if you have been heard?