Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Day Nine


“Without the true interaction of sincerity and loving kindness, no relationship can be deemed authentic.”

I’m not feeling myself tonight, so I’m going to make this one short. This is not exclusive to romantic relationships.  Sincerity and kindness are essential to any relationship, but they are not the only essentials. Truth is another big one. I would rather have someone be truthful and it hurt my feelings a bit than lie to me and spare me the pain. Why? Because the truth will eventually come out, and the pain will be at least two-fold (the pain of truth, and the pain of someone who was trusted lying to me).

This is beginning to feel like more of a rant than a spiritual journey (which is what I had intended it to be).  As will all true progress, this is going at a snail’s pace. I can feel a slight difference now from when I began, but I can’t feel the difference day-to-day. Every day I feel myself caring more and helping more. There are times (already) when I just want to trash to project and keep going the way I have been for years, but I know that there is a purpose for the project. And I get this feeling – a slight twitching in my intuition – something I’ve been looking forward to for years (something I’ve REALLY wanted) will happen if I finish. It may sound selfish, but I am doing this for me and not for everyone else. While it’s true that others will benefit from my being a better person, I am doing this for my, first and foremost.

Enough for tonight, I need to get to bed before I fall asleep on my laptop. Goodnight, all. Have a lovely day.

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